This week has been awful. Every day I’ve been up and down and I can’t stop thinking about you. I’m so deeply hurt and every day I feel empty. And I feel jealous of others who freely talk to you. I want to talk to you freely but I’m so hurt and your confusion makes me feel rejected. I just want to be around you and know that everything is good between us but it’s so upsetting because every time I see you I remember the rejection. I feel drained. Nothing makes me happy. I’m just passing the days and evaluating how I can get out of here. I feel so empty without you. How is it that other people can talk to you? I’m so jealous! I want to storm over and tell you not to talk to them! That I want your attention. That you should be ignoring them and talking to me. I hurt deeply every day. I just feel exhausted. I sleep to pass the time, so I don’t have to feel and think. So I can shut away the pain for a few hours. I’m trying to let go and it’s so difficult. I love you so much and I’m still in love with you. I want to be with you. Every day I feel I disappear into this world. I want to run away. Run away and hope I forget all of this. I miss you so much. You’re indecisiveness destroying us second by second. I feel sad. I pray I feel better soon.

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